Mia

Mia- July 2008

I've had this post on my heart for some time now. Actually...before I even started the blog. I knew I needed to share it here. As much as I’d like to put it out of my memory…I can’t and I won’t. I am reminded daily of the happenings I will tell you about below.

We decided to take the family to Cancun this year for our summer vacation. We traveled there with another family and had started planning it 6 months before. This was Mia’s first trip to a real “beach” and she loved it. The beach was beautiful. On day 2, we finally left our comfy spot at the pool and ventured out to the beach.

Mia had such a blast playing in the waves (as you can see above). She’d let them hit her ankles and then fall into the sand as if they had knocked her over. I spent the majority of our vacation taking pictures (obviously).
The older kids were having a blast attempting to build a sandcastle, Dad was helping pack sand…and I of course was busy snapping pictures. I sat down for a brief second to change the batteries in my camera. Bear with me here as my memory of the next five minutes is clouded as things happened so fast. None of us are sure how many seconds or minutes my “brief second” really was. When I sat down….Mia was here…..

The next thing I remember….Tyler yells “Mom/Dad….Mia is gone”.



Mia was gone.

That beautiful ocean was no longer beautiful to us.

I can remember Gabe running into the water…me not knowing if he saw Mia or was just searching.
I couldn’t move….I can remember praying “dear God, NO! NO! NO! I WILL NOT give her up!”

He quickly returned with our angel….she was shaking…scared…I couldn’t let go of her. I could only sit there with her in my arms and cry with her.
Needless to say….we didn’t swim in the ocean for the remainder of the vacation.

The following day both of the girls and I were walking to kids club. I was a little nervous about leaving Mia. The water park wasn’t any deeper than her ankles (with no waves) but the happenings the day before left me terrified. Ky could sense I was nervous as I was telling her that she was big sis and really needed to stay with Mia at all times. They both really wanted to go for the craft time but I more than anything wanted them with me.

Ky calmly said, “Mom…please don’t take this the wrong way but you know that if God is ready to take Mia and it’s her time….there is nothing that we can do to stop it”. ?!?!?!

What did my 10 year old just say to me??? As tears began to flow I had no words to respond. Luckily, my dear friend Emily later explained to Ky about our choices and that we can make choices that sometimes lead to consequences that aren’t always welcome. Thank you, Emily! I was speechless. ….We moved past all of this and did make the best of the remainder of our time together in Mexico.

When we finally returned to Dallas I was so grateful to bring our three children safely home with us. I couldn’t wait until Sunday came so that I could be in God’s house and THANK HIM that I still had my babies. We were running a little late so I asked Gabe to check the kids in so I could go save a seat. I needed to be there that day…more than any other…and wanted to be as close to the front as I could.

I quickly made my way in and landed on the 4th row. The earlier service had run long so this one still had a few minutes before starting. The moment I sat down the presence of the Holy Spirit overwhelmed me. I uncontrollably gasped for air. I began to deeply breathe…to take in His presence.

We began to move into worship and then into Pastor Bryan’s sermon, “YES, Lord!”

I’m thinking… “Oh goodness…I just yelled NO! NO! NO! to God less than a week ago….here we go....” I knew right then....this sermon was written for me :) He began to speak out of Matthew 9…about faith and trust. About trusting God when He’s leading us but our path isn’t clear. I took three things from that service:

1) I can’t move to the next place God want me to be without leaving where I am today (this one is a BIG challenge to me….I don’t like change)

2) I have to leave what is secure to move to the next level

3) When God gives me an opportunity… I don’t have forever to seize it.

Long story short...I took God’s challenge that morning….I renewed my faith and committed to move to the next level with Him.

Take my life and let it be
Consecrated, Lord, to Thee;
Take my hands and let them move
At the impulse of Thy love.

Take my feet and let them be
Swift and beautiful for Thee;
Take my voice and let me sing,
Always, only for my King.


Take my lips and let them be
Filled with messages from Thee,
Take my silver and my gold,
Not a mite would I withhold.

Take my moments and my days,
Let them flow in endless praise;
Take my intellect and use
Every pow’r as Thou shalt choose.

Take my will and make it Thine,
It shall be no longer mine;
Take my heart, it is Thine own,
It shall be Thy royal throne.

Take my love, my Lord, I pour
At Thy feet its treasure store;
Take myself and I will be
Ever, only, all for Thee.

I can tell you that today…I’m still amazed. I’m amazed by the God we serve. I’ve followed so many other journeys of mom’s who weren’t able to keep their blessings. Honestly, I do ask Him at times. “God, why me? Why am I so special to you?”
I told you earlier of the grief I often carry for Angie. And then there is Sumi. She lost her dear Jenna to a drowning accident.

Thank you Lord for the blessings you have given me! You never cease to amaze me.

If you made it this far with me…thank you for letting me share with you.
You see...Mia has this special gift...she is the master at pushing mommy's "buttons". But now what were previously my hot spots...are not longer hot spots. I am thankful for every moment with my Mia...even if she's attempting to aggravate me. God allowed me to keep my Mia here with me on earth ...and I must enjoy every moment of my time with her.
-Tiffany

He knows the plans that He has for us. They are all to prosper us and not to harm us.
(Jeremiah 29:11)